Freedom…. to not know what I will be doing next…

I used to have a large notebook with a list of things to do. I had a 5 year plan once. Then I had vague imaginings of happy ever after.

But since even before Brexit it has gradually become impossible to make plans. Part of it is, I think , living in Italy , where unexpected things are normal. Then I have changed a bit and try to say yes more than no to things. And today has been like that.

I would like to state for the record that I did not have a hangover this morning. But I had spent a lot of time with people over the weekend so I thought I would skulk at home by myself. I have a commission to begin but tomorrow will do.

However I had said I would be at home to a client and so now I will be starting something new next week. I am part excited and part nervous.

After that I thought I would watch Jonathon Yeo paint dexter fletcher on youtube. It was so funny and interesting. That is definitely one of the good things about lockdown. It would not be happening normally. As a painter it is so reassuring that someone who is a successful portrait painter still has a lot of the same attitudes that I have. Such as not understanding artists who have been to college or whatever when they use certain words and terms. And referring to them as proper artists….like he isnt!!!

As I am getting braver I thought I might photograph the sitter and have a go on my kindle. It took ages but I am not unhappy with the result. Maybe tomorrow I will try to draw him from the live screening. I didn’t think I could do that but I have a vague plan. I really enjoy learning new things.

Then I was speaking more on the phone about another project which could be very different . I don’t know where that will lead either.

Looks like this week will be not what I expected. It is both exciting and scary living like this.

I did get out and go food shopping . It was sunny at the time and that is the most free I have felt in ages. It is getting normal to wear a mask in the supermarket. The girl behind the till was wearing a pretty pink one today. I considered stopping and drawing something on my phone …. but maybe the next time.

Am glad it’s nearly wine time. It was a lovely birthday weekend and I enjoyed catching up online with lots of people. My face is nearly sore with smiling.

I wonder what this new year will be like…….

Watching Jonathon Yeo paint. I dont know how he can concentrate and talk at the same time.
Not quite right but not bad effort……

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