dragging confidence from all the corners

How do you carry on when hardly anyone believes you can make it?

Every time I return to my roots I am confronted by kindly negativity which though well meant makes me feel like I am some sort of deluded fool. ( this may of course be true)

However  I once read a quote from Harley Brown , who writes in the international artist, something along the lines of , an artist starting out needs crazed self belief. And after years of feeling so un confident that I thought people bought my paintings for the frames, I have finally arrived at my version of crazed self belief. And I like it.

It gets me up in the morning , ready to go. It keeps me going when I am down to my last 100 euros. I t makes me feel that I am doing something important, that will last. that I am contributing something to society. That I matter and what I am doing has an impact on other people.

(my grand daughter who is here and been looking at my recent paintings, just said “Grannyannie I think you are the best painter in the world.”  obviously she has great taste and discrimination and so what if she is a little prejudiced, its like  food for my soul.)

But back to the point how does a person hold on to  this belief in the face of apparent common sense advice to give up and get into the real world.

Well I think that what I need to do, and am doing is ;

1. search for and keep in touch with the few people brave enough to say , go for it.

2. hold on to and treasure all the positive comments, experiences  and times when I have succeeded in what I aimed for.

3. every week count up all the things I have acheived and give myself credit for carrying on.

4. and finally , remind myself that I have done more than I ever thought I could and it has been hard but so incredibly rewarding . therefore I owe it to myself to see what else I can do.

This blog is keeping me going!

One comment

  1. Hey—You are relying entirely too much on feedback from other people to determine how you feel about your work!! The only downside, is you must also try not to take to heart the “good” feedback as well. I am always working on this myself. People have a world of motives (sometimes quite obscure) for saying what they do, so don’t forget it. If the work feels right to you, then all is well!

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