This morning I think I confirmed about 90% that I can stay in Italy after *******brexit. I won’t even dignify the word with a capital letter.

This last few years have been difficult in lots of ways and I have done my best , but always at the back of mind was the thought that every summer might be my last here thanks to the b word. ( obviously there are other reasons I could have to leave , but none so completely unnecessary. )

I ‘ve got good at making every day count. But I can’t forget the nights and times when I wondered if I would end up homeless. I remember the relief I felt every time it was postponed. And the people ( who had nothing to lose and knew very little) discounting my fears. I knew I wasn’t alone in feeling afraid, and alone.

Now it seems , according to a good friend and what I have read on the internet that as I have been legally resident here for more than 10 years and have ID etc I may need to get one document , though neither of us knows what that is , but we have until December 2021 to find out.

I am not going to go on and on about this as even though this is only a brief mention of something that has, no matter how hard, I tried been there like a pervasive dark shadow for years.

Instead I want to go out and celebrate tomorrow feeling more or less normal and that some government is not going to take my life away from me without a second thought.

However today I have just sat about and did very little. It has felt like I can stop. And so I have.

Tomorrow despite the virus I could start to think about my life here without that particular dark shadow.

Maybe I will be extra inspired to paint the light coming into the dark valley.

I did do one thing today. I decided to paint the shower base white. I think 2 coats of white paint and maybe 4 coats of varnish should do it. And I plan to buy a new mat for it. I have been thinking it doesn’t look very welcoming for some time so this might help.

Someone collected and paid for 3 paintings today. As I wasn’t expecting them I was dressed in a black vest thing which was actually the top of a black dress, painty rolled up leggings and pink fleecy slipper socks with the heels worn out. I’d like to think that my “artistic personality ” made my outfit seem wildly radical….. but am not convinced 🤔

After my lovely evening out last night I am reminded that life does not have to be only work and that a bit of stimulating company is even better than wine.

But talking of wine I have ” inadvertently ” opened the good stuff instead of the ordinary……oh dear😃😃