I remember more than 20 years ago I had a virus and two years later I still felt not ok. It was a strange thing where some days I would be ok and others I would feel faint and tired. But I always felt ok when I was doing what I wanted to do. .
I remember going to the doctor eventually thinking maybe I was anemic. I told him my symtoms and he offered me antidepressants. I couldn’t understand why because I didnt feel particularly miserable. I turned them down and went off thinking what an idiot doctor.
Now am not so sure. It’s hard to tell at this time what is going on. Some of the time I am ok and the next day I feel ill. Today was particularly bad. Is very strange!
However today I started to write a new book and I got so into it that I wrote more than 1000 words . I can’t quite believe I am doing this again,
but it seems I actually enjoyed writing the last one. I am not sure if its a good book but plan A was to finish it. And I did.
It was a bit dull and windy again this morning so after I got bored with twitter I thought maybe I should go for a walk to get myself going .
That hill is so steep!!! This time I sat down for a rest half way up. I have been feeling quite choked up, maybe hayfever, and that didnt help. My legs ached and I was very out of breath.
Its going to be so easy to see if I get fit.
But I made it to the top , greeted a man with a dog and then took some photos of wildflowers to use in my next commission. It made me feel good to call them reference photos. .( not just something to do while getting my breath back .)
I did feel a bit more cheerful when I got back and set off to cut the canvas for the commission.
Today all I had planned to do was to get the canvas ready to paint.
First I tried stapling it loosely over another canvas on a stretcher as I had no free wall space to tack it up on.
That was not very satisfactory and it took me about an hour to decide that to change round my work room was my only option. So that took another 2 hours by the time I had moved the printer, cleared the big folding table,taken a hammer to it to get it folded down and then shoved it under the bed, rearranged a lot of paper and my watercolour equipment, taken the staples out of the canvas, nailed it to the wall, moved the cupboard and finally painted the floor underneath it as I hadn’t bothered before. But I am organised now and can start tomorrow. Good thing that I have given myself 2 weeks to do it.
And that was pretty much today done except for another dose of David Hockney documentary. I wonder if it will influence my painting. While I was cutting the canvas I looked up and saw the self portrait I did on a blue background on a big piece of hardboard . It was done quickly and partly from life and I like it a lot. It reminded me of his portraits. Maybe I really will have a go at a series of portraits… whole body, not just faces. That would be exciting.
Is wine time again ….. new 6pm later time . Stayed up till 11pm last night. Very late for me.