Mostly I am frustrated with my painting today. I am scared I will make a mess of it . I don’t really know how to paint anything but portraits…and sometimes I am not sure about that.

As its a commission, then it is to please someone else. It must be amazing to be so famous that you can paint how you want and the client is happy because YOU painted it. I find it quite worrying every time I do a commission that I am trying to live up to someone else’s expectations.

Thats why I loved painting the coronavirus series because I was the client.

However tomorrow is the day I will wake up and know what I am doing and it will all magically go right. It has happened now and again , but it’s not very reliable. About as reliable as going to a play in Italian and believing this time I will understand……

I can’t find the original photo I used to work from for this painting and so I am working from a small painting I did. And it is about 9 times as big as the original. ( I know because I just went through and measured it. )

I am probably just going through the ” why did I ever think I could paint…this is a disaster” stage of the painting. It happens almost every time. And I am always surprised .

Anyways. It looks better in the photo so maybe there is hope.

I decided to go for my allowed walk today to get some energy. I had to talk myself into it by saying I would take more photos .( Its a view from the red brick road that I am painting.) I must have stopped at least 10 times before I got to the top and wasn’t even out of breath. Am not sure it would even qualify as exercise. Have rationalised that it is my mental health that I am exercising.

I also discovered that my mask , when worn slightly under my chin hides quite a few wrinkles etc and is in fact quite flattering. Who would have thought. 😀

I pull it up if I meet anyone but it didn’t hurt to feel that I looked 10 years younger even if no one could see. And it matched my outfit very nicely..

Nothing much else happened today. I read a bit, painted a bit, watched a short video on painting flowers- nice but not much use- watched another interview with David Hockney. I think I like his voice. And now that I have convinced myself that tomorrow I will be better….. its wine time.

Hurray!!!